But the men of Sodom were wicked and sinners before the L-rd exceedingly. (Bereishis 13:13)

The mishneh in Pirkei Avos tells us that a person who lives by the philosophy of “What’s mine is mine, and what’s yours is yours” is either an average individual, or – according to some – a person with the characteristics of Sodom. It seems to me quite odd to have such polarized evaluations of this philosophy. Based on the teachings of Rav Sholom Schwadron, I would like to explain as follows: There are some people who are deep thinkers and some people who are shallow and superficial. Unfortunately, by and large, most people do not think very much, and do not realize that they have obligations beyond the obvious. Therefore, they feel, “What’s mine is mine and what’s yours is yours.” Indeed, it is simple and innocent, but not something that shows any deep thought.

Rav Sholom tells of the following incident that happened to him. He was travelling outside of Eretz Yisrael, but was limited in his communication, as he did not speak the native tongue. He noticed that the proprietor of a certain store looked Jewish, and he asked him in Yiddish about the purchase that he needed. The proprietor answered him very short and to the point in a very unfriendly manner. Rav Sholom thought it was a bit odd. Nevertheless, he purchased the goods and left the store. As he continued his travels, he happened upon that same proprietor, who this time wished him a warm “sholom aleicheim”, asking him where he was from and speaking to him with kind words. Rav Sholom was puzzled by this kind of “Dr. Jeckyl and Mr. Hyde” personality. Rav Sholom asked his host as to a possible explanation in the change in demeanor of the proprietor. The host laughed and said, “The answer is obvious! When you were in his store looking at his goods, he was afraid you might ask for a discount or a handout, and he didn’t want to give away his merchandise for a discount. After you left the store and were on neutral grounds, he treated you as any fine and upstanding Jew would treat you.”  (Indeed the Gemora tells us that if you want to know what a person is really like, one of the ways to check is with his monetary attitudes.)

The people of Sodom lived in the lap of luxury with all of the comforts of life. They were afraid of an influx of people who would put a squeeze on their “limited” resources, and they would have to sacrifice a bit of their good life in order to give to others. To prevent this they developed a philosophy, “What’s mine is mine, and what’s yours is yours.” This is also the underlying basis of communism. People do not give charity, and instead everyone is expected to pull their own weight and not be a parasite. But I have read that those who run the communist governments lead a more opulent lifestyle than the simple folk. How could this be in true communism? The answer is obvious: They created a philosophy in order that they should be able to take from others.

From the Torah perspective, we understand that if Hashem gave us the ability to help others, that is what we should do.

I would like to share an incident, which to me is an extension of the philosophy of middos Sodom. A person complained to me that in today’s society it is difficult to do the mitzvah of hachnasas orchim. When I asked him why, he responded, “Most of the homeless people are too frightening to bring into my home, and everyone else seems not to need hachnasas orchim.” I challenged the man, “You live within a 5 minute walk of the Mir Yeshiva. There are many bochurim who need a place to call “a home away from home.’ They are quite normal and with these bochurim you could easily fulfill this mitzvah.” He returned to me the next day after consulting with his wife who said that she is not willing to accept upon herself this solemn obligation, for if she were to host bochurim, she was afraid that she would not fulfill her obligation of to a satisfactory level and therefore she decided not to take it on. Again, an aspect of selfishness. The middah of Sodom represents a person who is not willing to part with his position in life and put himself in someone else’s shoes for it may cause him to lose some of that which he has.

I once heard from a great Jew that the punishment of Sodom was that now they cannot grow or produce anything of their own. The only thing that they can do for their livelihoods is to help the unfortunate of the world bathe and rejuvenate with their climate and salts. Hashem made things this way so that the residents of Sodom would be forced to always help others while relying on others for their own sustenance. Let us all learn from them to never get to the point that we need this lesson taught to us.