“And Moshe said to them, ‘If you will do this thing…and be guiltless before the Lord, and before Yisra᾽el; and this land shall be your possession before the Lord.’” (Bamidbar 32:20-22)

Moshe Rabbeinu makes an agreement with the tribes of Reuven, Gad, and half of Menashe regarding the conditions under which they will receive their portion of Eretz Yisrael on the eastern side of the Jordan River. Moshe tells them, “If you do what you have committed to do, you will be ‘clean’ from Hashem and the people”. The Chasam Sofer (Rabbi Moses Schreiber 1762-1839) in Teshuvos 6:59 discusses this phrase and its implications. He says that achieving ‘cleanliness’ before Hashem is far easier than before people. Hashem sees the truth of one’s deeds; people, however, have complaints even about the most sincere actions, and will always find something to criticize.

Rav Shmuel Wosner (1913-2015) in his teshuvos 7:30 challenges the Chasam Sofer. He brings a verse in Yehoshua 22:2 where Klal Yisrael acknowledges that these tribes have fulfilled their obligation. If the Torah itself confirms that people were satisfied, what difficulty was the Chasam Sofer addressing?

The Sefer Kehillos Yitzchak explains via the episode with Sarah and Avimelech. After Sarah was taken to Avimelech’s house, she soon conceived and had a child. Hashem made Yitzchak look like Avraham so that cynics of that generation (letzanei hador) should not say that Avimelech was the father (Rashi Bereishis 25:19). Why would one have to be a cynic to reach that conclusion? Avraham and Sarah were married for many decades without children. Nine months after she was in Avimelech’s house, she had a child – wouldn’t that seem like a logical suspicion!?

The classic answer is that Avraham had already fathered Yishmael. Sarah’s barrenness could not have been due to Avraham, making the claim baseless. But the Kehillas Yitzchak offers a novel explanation. Leitzanim will make jokes about something even when they know it to be false. Even though they knew that Sarah could not have become pregnant in Avimelech’s house – since Hashem had closed all orifices of the household, making conception impossible – they still spread the rumor. Cynicism does not require truth; it only requires an audience.

With this, we can understand the Chasam Sofer. Hashem and Klal Yisrael both said that Bnei Gad and Bnei Reuven had fulfilled their obligation. However, that does not silence the cynics who would still say, “Who said they did everything they were supposed to?” Even when the facts are clear, there is always room for a little bit of cynicism, and comments made with intent to belittle can undermine something important and firm.

As we stand in the three weeks, our interactions with friends and family require extra care. Even a small joke or a passing comment can actually ruin a person’s reputation, career or life, even if it is obviously untrue.

Let us follow the ways of the Chasam Sofer and be extra careful to avoid causing even the slightest negativity towards a fellow Jew. By doing so, we should merit to have Moshiach arrive before Tisha B’Av this year!