Yaakov ended commanding his sons, he then gathered up his feet into the bed, and expired, and was gathered to his people. (Bereishis 49:33)

RASHI: AND HE EXPIRED — but the word death is not mentioned in his case, and our  Teachers therefore said: (Taanis 5b) “Jacob our father didn’t die”.

In this week’s parsha many of the meforshim contemplate the meaning of death to those who passed on, and how those who remain here in this world should feel when someone leaves this world. On the brothers’ statement “Please forgive the sin of the servants of the G-d of your father” (50:17) Rashi gives an explanation which leaves us with much food for thought. He explains that they were saying that even though Yaakov Avinu died, Yaakov’s G-d was still alive. It seems to me that the idea that Hashem could ever not be alive – and therefore the brothers had to say he was still alive – is not something that most people would assume. Therefore, why did Rashi explain that the brothers felt they should point this out to Yosef?

The Chasam Sofer explains the verse about Chanoch’s death: “and Chanoch walked with God: and he was not; for God took him.” (Bereishis 5:24)  It seems superfluous to state that since Chanoch died, he was no longer with us. The Chasam Sofer goes on to explain that there are people who in their lifetimes impacted others to the point that even after their death their presence is still felt. The Torah was telling us that Chanoch was not one of those people.

I would like to add to this idea, using an incident that happened to me last week. I met someone with whom I had been close for many years. He gave me an article about the sixtieth yahrzeit of Rav Aharon Kotler and then commented that he knew I would like the article because I considered myself very close to Reb Aharon. While this statement is true, an unaffiliated Jew would find it quite puzzling. How could one be close to a man who he never met or even saw? The answer is obvious: Most of my Rabbaim throughout my years were students of Reb Aharon, and they were always quoting him to the point that I actually felt I knew him myself. This idea is similar to entering a beis medrash and hearing the students learning gemora and saying “Abaya says….Rava says…etc.” Even though we all know that Abaya and Rava died years ago, in the Toras Chaim they live on.

Yaakov Avinu is actually the one of whom the gemora (Taanis 5b) states that he was “lo meis” – he didn’t die. The gemora persists and asks, “How could it be? They eulogized, embalmed and buried him!” The gemora admits that this is a good question, but not an insurmountable problem, as the Gemora answers, “מה זרעו בחיים אף הוא בחיים” – Just as his son is alive, so too is he alive.

Based on this, I would suggest that a person’s impact is measured by the influence that he has on the world. This idea is well known to all of us. When one has a yahrzeit or says yizkor, one does extra mitzvos, supports Torah, and gives charity to the poor. All these things are helpful to the soul that has passed on because it was through the impetus of those who passed away that one generally performs those mitzvos. In fact, there are those who explain the concept B’rah kara d’avua – the son is the leg of his father – means exactly that. Though the father cannot move any longer because he has left this world, he is still considered alive and moving through his son, as the Gemora quoted above states.

At the end of the Rav Dessler biography, it says that the Russian doctor who tended to Rav Dessler came to the shiva house. When he walked in, he saw the pain on the face of Rav Dessler’s daughter. He stopped and said to her, “Why are you crying? Would that I were as alive at this moment as he is!”

May we all merit to live our lives in a way that keep us alive forever.