Tana D’Bei Eliyahu Raba Chapter 31: It says an abomination with Avoda Zara, as it is written (Devarim 7:26) “You shall not bring an abomination into your house…” and it says abominations of rudeness, as it says (Mishlei 16:5) “Every haughty person is an abomination to Hashem…”

There is a story told about a chasidishe man who went to his Rebbe to ask advice. He explained to his Rebbe that he is afflicted with haughtiness, and he has tried many times different ways to work on this negative trait. The Rebbe thought about it and said, “Sit here in the back of the room, and probably by the end of the day I will come up with some piece of advice to help you out.” The man took a tehillim and sat in the back of the room, waiting to get this valuable advice from his beloved Rebbe. After only a short while a man walked in and cried to the Rebbe about his plight. He had a daughter who was of marriageable age, and the only thing stopping her from a good shidduch was a dowery. He felt he had no choice but to bite off more than he could chew and promise a hefty sum for a fine son-in-law. With Hashem’s help, THE bochur came on the scene, they made a lechaim, and the wedding was to happen shortly. Hashem put it all together, just the last piece of the puzzle was still missing. The Rebbe asked the man, “How much money are you missing?” and he responded, “3000 rubles”. The Rebbe smiled, turned to the man in the back of the room, and said to him, “Here is your opportunity. Donate to this case of hachnasas kallah 3000 rubles!” The man in the corner got agitated and said to the Rebbe, “I myself do not have enough money to put bread on the table! How do you expect me to give this guy so much money?” The Rebbe responded, “I’ll find a different way to get this man money for his daughter’s marriage,” and within a short time, had the 3000 rubles.

There was soon another knock on the Rebbe’s door, and the chief Dayan of the city came in and said, “Rebbe, I need your help! In Beis Din we have a very serious case and the dayanim are in deadlock. Could the Rebbe please give us some advice and input?” The Rebbe said, “Tell me the question at hand and I will see what I can do.” The Dayan proceeded to explain the question. The Rebbe then said to the man in the back, “Could you bring us a proof as to which side is right?” The man then says, “Rebbe, I must tell you the truth. I didn’t make it all the way through cheder. I don’t even know how to learn gemora. I am sorry, but I can’t help in this case.” The Rebbe said a few short statements to the Dayan which cast a new light on the question, and allowed the dayanim to understand which way to proceed with clarity.

A short time later there was yet another knock on the door, and a prominent businessman came in and asked the Rebbe for a piece of business advice. The businessman explained all the aspects of his issue and then asked, “What is the prudent thing to do in order to make a sure profit?” Again, the Rebbe turned to the man in the back of the room and asked, “What kind of advice do you have for our esteemed businessman?” The man responded, “Rebbe, for a living I am a water carrier. Even simple math is difficult for me. I am not capable of giving advice to a seasoned businessman!” The Rebbe gave the businessman an astounding piece of advice on how to invest, and he left with a smile on his face.

The Rebbe then turned to the man in the back and said: “I understand from you that you don’t have money, you are lacking in Torah, and you have a shortfall in common business sense.” The man responded, “Yes, that is true.” The Rebbe then asked him, “So how is it possible for you to be haughty?!”

We all chuckle at this story and we think to ourselves, “What is really with this ‘haughty’ man in the back?” If we were more honest with ourselves, we would realize that this fellow represents each and every one of us. The verse says that a person who is haughty is an abomination (toavas hashem gaavas lev). When we see that verse at first, many of us understand the idea that being haughty is not good. But is it really an abomination?

I think that the story that we mentioned above makes it quite clear.

The Torah warns us, “Do not bring a toeva to your house.” The simple meaning is an idol, but the understood meaning is anything that could cause someone to sin. If you think that you can have the temptation and can still control yourself, I think that is an aspect of haughtiness that others would find laughable.